I am often the person my friends come to for sage advice. I apparently have a way with words and I make my friends feel good about themselves. They feel safe, secure and comfortable in my presence. I always took this to be the highest praise that anyone has ever heaped upon me. Often though, I don’t listen to my own advice. Today is one of those days where I gave some advice to a friend, but also a day when I am going to try to heed it.
My good friend, a beautiful, gentle and genuinely sweet individual who has suffered greatly in the last few years with the loss in close succession of both her parents messaged me because she was feeling quite low and disappointed. The reason: having taken two years out following her completion of college (and coping with loss and getting things in order) she had her application for the master’s she had set her sights on rejected. She was stuck, unsure if she should give up on the idea altogether or take another year. She was impatient.
My advice, which is very poignant for me at this time in my life, career wise, and passion wise and in terms of love, is something I hope to take aboard from now on.
I said: Make it three, or four, or five, it doesn’t matter. We are only young. And even if we weren’t we only have one life. Society teaches us that we have to do things at set ages but it is all a load of hogwash. Before modern times we would be married with a rake of kids by now because of society. Now it is finish school, get a degree, get a job, meet a person, settle down, have kids, work until you are 65, retire, have grandchildren, get old, etc etc etc but this is all formulaic and life is anything but formulaic. In the words of Andrea Gibson, Life is Poetry, not Math. We all have paths and desires and needs that are as different as the variance within the pigment of our eyes. We need to do what is right for us, what we want, no matter how long it takes, and not because we are conditioned to be impatient and do things quickly and in line with life blocks. Take two or ten years but never give up because of time.
Have patience with yourself. Have patience with life. You will only get one chance. Take heed and benefit from this once in a lifetime opportunity of living. Don´t sell yourself short and don´t give up because of how you feel things SHOULD be. Just be. And enjoy.
stumblingthroughopportunity 